Now That's Talent!
Mood:  surprised
Topic: Yowza!
What's a girl to do if she can't sing, dance, or play a musical instrument? Why, grab a knife and skin a muskrat, that's what! Get a load of this. Do you think the contestant should match her gown to the color of the fur, the blood, or the guts? Hmmm...tough call.

Say What?!
Mood:  cheeky
Topic: Yowza!
I live where it gets cold and because of that we have a little something downtown(or uptown, whichever you prefer) called the Skyway. The buildings themselves are connected on the 2nd level by windowed walkways that cross the streets and inside each building there is a hallway that goes through the building leading from one walkway to the next. The skyway level of all of these buildings has become one very long shopping district with convenience stores, restaurants, and of course, entrances to the major department stores. The hallways/walkways where there are no shops have lighted "billboard" advertisements. It's really quite a maze and until you get a feel for it, you can find yourself a bit turned around and confused.

During the lunch hour, not only do people use the skyway to go for lunch, many use it for exercise. Personally, I walk for my exercise and I have two routes that I follow depending on if I go pre-lunch rush, or post-lunch rush. They're about the same distance and I can get a good 45 minute to an hour walk under my belt. I've been doing my walk post-lunch rush lately (I'd been doing it pre-lunch rush for a good year) and along my route, there is one of these lighted billboards for the Discover Card that reads "I'm expensing lunch and getting a cashback bonus too! Is that legal?" Now, I'm normally traveling at a decent clip and every single time I pass this particular sign, I catch the beginning part in my peripheral vision - only I see it as "I'm expressing lunch...". Having breastfed my daughter, including pumping(a.k.a. expressing) while at work, I just have to chuckle.

Kudos To SAHMs Everywhere
Mood:  special
Topic: Yowza!
The flu bug bit DH on the weekend, so for the past 6 days I have done the SAHM thing. I have to say, after day four, I was so ready to go back to work. Don't get me wrong, I love Lauren to death, but I was so worn out at the end of every day, it wasn't funny. It didn't help that she has pretty much given up on her afternoon nap. Oh, she still needs it, but she can get by without one and always wants to. I, on the other hand, needed that afternoon nap. We managed to keep busy all day, every day. It definitely helped to get out of the house every day and our normal weekend routine became our every day routine - Sesame Street (a.k.a. kid TV) in the morning while having breakfast, out to take care of errands, then play time at the park if it wasn't too cold (it actually hit 40 one day!) or at the indoor playground at the mall if it was. This was followed by lunch at the mall and finally off to home to try for the elusive afternoon nap.

It worked well and I found myself telling DH that I was enjoying being home with Lauren - until yesterday, day 6. We would have gone to dance class, but Lauren started coming down with a cold on day 4 and by day 6, I just didn't want to expose the other kids to her germs (unlike other parents who don't think EVEN ONCE about what their kids are passing around - but that's another post altogether that I don't think I'll cover because it would put me over the edge). I don't know if it's because we didn't get out of the house or because I'd reached some kind of limit on kid games, kid TV, and kid movies. I like to think I would have been OK if we'd been able to go out. I could be fooling myself but what the heck, I'm going with it.

Long story short - I'm sending out kudos to all of those SAHMs out there that do this every day of every week of every month. It takes a special person to be able to live a kid's life that many times over and retain their sanity and most of all, their patience.

Man Declared Dead Found Breathing In Morgue
Mood:  surprised
Topic: Yowza!
Here's a link, but I don't think it will remain as long as this post...N.C. Man Incorrectly Declared Dead

Can you believe it? Oh my God - just imagine. That was my first thought, then a dream I had had about my mother a couple years after she had passed away flashed to mind. We were in the hospital and had just experienced her death. They had taken her body away and as we stood around talking, she was brought back in - alive. Not just lying there close to death's door, but alive, much more alive. She sat up, talked to us, got dressed. The doctors were amazed and the family was so grateful and relieved. But the dream continued on. In about a half hour she died again. I remember feeling upset that I had to relive the death, but I had known her being alive wasn't going to last.

Can you believe it though? He's in critical condition. What about the family - first hearing he's dead and then the police showing up saying he's not after all! What if the medical examiner hadn't noticed that subtle breath? I hate to think.

Someone's got some splainin' to do on this one.